Soul Mate Q & ADo you have a soul mate question? Our f'ree ebook, Direct Your Destiny, is packed full of
information about the topic. Sign-up for it here: www.holisticmakeover.com.
How can you tell if you’re soul mates? How can we explore the feeling we’ve been together before?
Question: Eight months ago I met a man. Almost immediately we seemed familiar to each other. We have had dreams of the same house and countryside in what appears to be Italy and of a life together there. This seemed odd as we are both black and have never been to Italy. We were not black in the dreams. We also seem very in tune to each other. Often having thoughts of the same subject when we are apart. One thinking of the other and the other then calling. I have often been thinking of him and he will later tell me that where ever he was, he felt me near him. I feel that we are soul mates and that somehow we were not really strangers when we met. How can you tell if you are soul mates and/or how do we explore this feeling that we have been together before. Or do you just accept this without being able to go any deeper. Thank you for any help you can give.
Stephen's Answer: It’s likely you are very connected with him now because you've spent a lot of time together in past lives and the spirit world. A soul mate is someone with whom you've shared a past life with, so yes, you and he are probably are soul mates. If you want to know more about the details of your lives together you can explore your connection through meditation or past life self-regression, but you need to ask the right questions and be patient to gain the insight you seek. Another way to explore past lives, karmic relationships, and soul mate connections is with the scripts in my book or with my guided meditation recordings.Many of us alive today have experienced life as a variety of races and nationalities in past lives. For example, I'm white now but have perceived clear visions of lives I lived as a black slave in the south sometime in the 1800s, as a member of a black tribe in Africa, and as Latinos, Asians, and other races.
Are there soul mate rules?Question: I read an article about soul mates which said that they disregard races and religion. Can soul mates also disregard age? If a woman is 8 years older than a man, can they be soul mates, too?
Stephen's Answer: Soul mates disregard everything. Yes, a couple who is eight years apart absolutely can be soul mates, as can one who is 65 years apart. Our customs of pairing up with someone our own age, race, class, etc. are human customs, not a spiritual ones. However, we often set things up before incarnating to make it easier to meet and become involved with the major players in our lives.Religious dogma & soul mates
Question: Do you have an opinion about women incarnating voluntarily to assist a particular soul mate through marriage? The Kabbalah teaches that women don't have an absolute need to be married, but that men do. It has to do with bringing children into the world. They say that a man is not complete without children. Stephen's Answer: It is common for our friends in the spirit world (we all have soul groups) to volunteer to help us after we incarnate through marriage, friendship, a parent-child relationship or other ways. But this is not something that only women do for men. We all do it for each other.Women don't have an absolute need to be married but men do? I don't know a lot about Kabbalah, but that seems to be assuming each of us incarnates exclusively as male or female every time or that all men and women have the same needs. Organized religions or systems of spiritual beliefs can be wonderful tools and help many. At the same time, they are influenced by human fears and beliefs and because of this they can be at times limiting or misleading.
According to the life between life research, when we spend time in the spirit world between lives we don’t practice any of the religious or spiritual systems that are popular today because we perceive ourselves and our lifetimes very clearly (our earthly justifications for our actions are meaningless). Religious or spiritual systems can provide very helpful guidelines for us while in body. Alternatively, meditation (to gain awareness and become centered) and the simple realization that we keep incarnating until we get it right, meaning that we are here to work through our karma and to learn to act out of love instead of fear, can be enough for those who chose a more independent and simplified path.
I lost my soul mate
Question: In 1984 I lost my soul mate. I had some short them relationships (three years), and then nothing since 1991. I sometimes think I would like to be in love and be loved back, but I feel "flat-lined", unable to generate what it takes to get going again. Yikes, am I going to spend the next fifty years alone?
Should I stay with my unspiritual husband or look for my twin flame? Question: My path has crossed with a number of male soul mates/kindred and possible a twin flame - I am grateful for the lessons their interaction bestows upon me, however I am currently married to my young son from one of my past lives - love him dearly, but we do not share any spiritual compatibility. The further I ascend, the father he seems to stubbornly stay put. He knows that I will ultimately leave him without the spiritual connection in practices and beliefs. For example, I am a Reiki practioner. He does not believe in the validity or encourage it -- I am forced to live a life of repression or judgment. I feel in my soul that I will be with another one day in this lifetime (I stay put here because I have small children)-- I can only wonder if it is one of the men that the Divine has led me to/visa versa. I am a successful clairvoyant myself, but for others...not very good at reading myself :)-- My question? Will I stay or will I go...and is my twin flame already in my life or is he looking for me too?
Stephen's Answer: I'm sorry to read of your loss. He may have been one of your soul mates, but you would benefit by realizing that we all have many. If you continue to think of him as the best and only love match for you, you may miss other valuable opportunities. You may be feeling "flat-lined" because you have not let go of him. Ask for spiritual help (from whomever you pray to or ask for help from) in letting go of him and moving on with your love life. Some of the guided meditations in my book or my audio recordings can help you do this too. Take his pictures off the wall and put away any of his things, if applicable. It's time to move on. Letting go doesn't mean you won't see him again or be with him again (on the “other side” or in another life), but instead you'll unblock your heart and be available for new love experiences.Stephen's Response: Will you stay or go? You have free will, but perhaps whatever you decide is destined. Some people may think that you need to stay for your kids. I personally feel it's okay to leave as long as you've fulfilled your karmic obligations to your husband, you do so peacefully without creating negative karma, and you make sure your children will not suffer (financially or emotionally) more than they would have if you had stayed. Kids know when their parents are unhappy together. Sometimes a divorce, when done right, can be better for them than if you had stayed together.
Is your twin flame in your life or is he looking for you too? Based on the numerology and past life regression research of my brother, myself, and others I respect, I regret to inform you that we do not have twin flames. Twin flames have been defined as "our other half" who was created at the same time as us, and if we could just find each other, we'd live together forever in bliss and harmony. I think this is earth-bound thinking based on a fear of being alone. We don't "pair off" in the spirit world.
However, we all have many soul mates and there are some who are far more compatible. Is one of those soul mates who is more compatible with you available to form a wonderful, compatible, loving relationship? Probably. This would be even more likely if you address any relationship blocks (we all have them) now, do what you need to do to prepare for a more appropriate person, and consider if you have any more karma to work through with your husband.
Will I find a soul mate and a father for my daughter for the rest of our lives?
Question: I am a single mother and divorced in 2000 after 9 year of marriage. I would like to know if there will be again a man coming into my life (soulmate-not soulfriend!) whom I can admire and learn from, have a great stepfather for my little daughter, and if I will remarry for the rest of my life. Thank you and looking forward to your answer.
Stephen's Response:
I know from my research that most major relationships are destined, so if you're not destined to be involved right now and if your daughter is not destined to have a great step-father, will you allow it to cause you unhappiness? I also know that most relationships have time limits and are not meant to be life long. If you meet a wonderful man and with whom you are mutually compatible with now, will you allow it to cause you unhappiness if you are only meant to be compatible for 10 years? Or will you let go of your expectations for each relationship and enjoy and accept it for what it is meant to be?I'd rather help you find your own answers, which is why I've written my book. You can be your own psychic because you have your answers within you. All you need to do it ask the right questions and know how to recognize the truth when it is presented to you. A great way to become aware of the answers you seek is through meditation and past life self-regression. My book has step-by-step instructions along with specific meditations you can use for love and other areas of life.
If what you're looking for is more precise information about the future, my brother Scott, who wrote the Love Cycles section of the book, can give you specific information about what is coming up for you and about compatibility with people you meet: www.ScottPetullo.com . Or you can use the numerology information in the book to determine and follow your own cycles and find out what potentials exist for you in the future. What to do when you can’t find the right one.
Question:
I’m 29 years old and have always wanted to fall in love with someone and experience a relationship but it never seems to happen for me. I have a whole shelf full of esoteric books and info on meditation, yoga and life management from a karma perspective and I have 4 books on Buddhism, so I understand these principles and how to invest in yourself. Unfortunately I am in a catch-22 situation now because you must be happy with yourself before you find the right person. But the problem is how can I be happy if this loneliness is making me so sad?
I really don't know what to do, I'm trying to stay strong, every time we go to a party or go to visit people, I try to keep an open mind as to who's going to be there, and obviously it will be a bonus if I meet someone, but it never happens, its just the same situation. What have I done to deserve this, I feel as if I am being tortured. What do you feel I can do here?Stephen's Response: The first thing I'd do is give up! Your expectations are causing you lots of unhappiness. Let go of your desire to find the right match. Keep telling yourself you are okay with being alone (for now) and that the right person will come along at the right time. Keep saying to yourself, "Fine. This must be my karma and I'm experiencing it for a reason, so I'll just accept the way things are." Say it until you feel it and mean it and then say it some more. Being grateful for your current situation will allow you to move on to the next level.
I have a feeling you may have some guilt from past lives. Searching for the "root cause of being unhappily single" through past life regression (which you can do on your own) may shed a lot of light on your situation. Then forgiving yourself for whatever you did or thought you did will lift the weight off you. Also, know that we all have love life cycles. Sometimes we have times in our lives that are prime for meeting compatible matches, and sometimes our timing is not conducive for love. You can determine and follow these with my book. Hang in there, because eventually you'll be in the right place at the right time and you'll make a good connection. But not if you expect to every time you go somewhere; instead you‘ll just scare away possibilities or project what you want onto someone who‘s not compatible. Let go of that desire and just know it will happen when it's meant to. Stop looking and trust that the right person will find you. Besides preparing for a compatible match by being your best and looking at your baggage, another thing you can do is ask yourself what would change in your life if you met and became involved with a compatible person. What changes would you not like? This may give you clues about potential blocks.Do you have a soul mate question? Our f'ree ebook, Direct Your Destiny, is packed full of
information about the topic. Sign-up for it here: www.holisticmakeover.com.